Are you the SAT because I’d do you for 3 hours and 45 minutes with a 10 minute break halfway through for snacks, and then I can stare at you for like 10 minutes and think ‘wow, I hope I don’t ruin this.’

— Dude on OKC with the best pick up lines I have ever heard (via katamarang)

(via quesadillasandweed)

You wrecked me and
I apologized.

— Never again. (via bridgetoteranarnia)

(via quesadillasandweed)


alternate ending to tfios

(via dirhty)

(Source: sean-codyvevo, via dirhty)

Holly is my family now, she’s my family and the babies that I make with her will be my children. The people that you work with are just, when you get down to it, your very best friends. (Goodbye Michael, 7x22)

(Source: pagets, via dundermifflinscranton)





Just a friendly reminder that u should call ur animals by gender-neutral or multiple pronouns.  They CAN understand you and YES it is possible for an animal to be trans.  Your cat having a penis does not make it male.  It is straight up animal abuse to deliberately misgender your pets so please do not do it.



this is it. this post summarizes all of tumblr logic. 

(via chickenugga)

i make vines

(Source: pyyrite, via neverletmegodear)


the reason you find little cuts and bruises you don’t remember getting is because at night bats fly in your room and beat you up in your sleep

(via bitchesaloud)



If you ever feel like you’ve screwed up, just remember that in 1348 the Scots thought it would be a good idea to invade England because the English were weakened by the Plague. They subsequently caught the plague themselves, went back to Scotland, and killed half their own population.


(via joshpeck)

Fixed. theme by Andrew McCarthy